Do you believe in magic?



Hello hello the world traveller is back, counting the scarce warm sunny days of the unusual summer coming to an end.

Ok, honestly the real title of this post should be: Do I believe in magic? Sounds paradoxical, ha? I operate magic on a daily basis… But just like with all things colored “human experiences”, with time, could it be that even the magic can wear off? I sometimes wonder if I my love for travel stems from my passion for experiencing and photographing the mother Earth and her ways, her many peoples and their many ways. Or is it that my endlessly restless spirit pushes me to always seek even more magical adventures, running away from home and from the frantic fear that magic can somehow slip away from me. That is if I get too comfortable in my routine, my habitual ways. Even if these pretty much comprise of shamanic practices, which are inherently magical…

After my Thailand trip, and as part of my birthday gift to somebody special, I got to attend a one week shamanic movements workshop with Lujan Matus. Talk about selfish gifts 🙂 . I believe I first learnt about Lujan Matus while researching some information on Carlos Castaneda. But I definitely remember noticing him in the documentary “The Cosmic Giggle”. Apart from the certain allure in his appearance, voice and mystical presence, he conveyed a strong sense of purpose, humor and quiet determination. I knew right there and then that I wanted to meet him but I didn’t feel I needed to. Lujan often says that “we never get what we want, we always get what we need”. So for a while, Lujan was out of picture for me, and I didn’t really seek to know more about him or his work.

Over the years, I have often received messages that I should make my body stronger and focus my personal spiritual practice on body movements more. Except for occasional flirting with tai chi, qigong and capoeira, I somehow lacked discipline to engage my body in any such practice more seriously. That is until I faced a physical exhaustion and complete energy drain due to intense client work at the end of last year. I have since stopped client work and started looking for ways to make my body stronger so it can uphold the energy work I do. This is how Lujan came back into picture for me; remember my birthday gift for somebody special 🙂 – well it turned out I was both the giver and the receiver in the co-shared experience. The week with Lujan was intense and my mind struggled. Surprisingly, my mind struggled more than my body did! Lujan’s spiral and coiling movements that traced over luminous balls and cone shapes around our body felt familiar. Yet at the same time I was frustrated with not being able to pinpoint the chi. I could definitely feel it in my hands, I could feel its ‘texture’ changing with each movement, yet I never felt in the flow. Not once. I was fully aware that my mind was interfering yet I was utterly unable to put my mind off trying to make the link between the way I am used to moving the energy and the movements I was learning from Lujan.

In the very last session, I asked Lujan if he would show us how his practice looks like when he’s not teaching but moving at his own pace. Politely but firmly he refused. Very determined to get the feel of how Lujan operates magic, I wasn’t gonna give up and reframed my question. He still refused… With the red cheeks burning with disappointment that his magic wasn’t gonna reveal itself to me, I immersed myself in repeating the practice with Lujan and the rest of the group one last time. Surprised at how quickly all of the heavy feelings dissipated, I was happy to blow him a kiss goodbye and get ready for our long drive back home. Shortly after leaving the workshop, we got stuck in traffic. I felt unusually calm and accepting of the idea that the prospect of our long drive was getting even longer. Time went by very slowly and when we finally started moving again the sun was almost setting leaving the skies to the beauty of an almost full moon. When in between the sun and the moon, I noticed a very bright cone shape opening in the sky, formed by bright coils of what seemed like strange little cloud formations, covered by a layer of spiraling rainbow color light. This was one of the most stunning sights I have ever seen. And in that moment I realized that chasing magic is a futile task. It is the magic that reveals itself to us when we are ready!

The whole week with Lujan was a humble and gentle reminder that I don’t operate the magic, nor Lujan does. Magic operates on its own. And that no matter which shamanic path we choose to walk, if we walk it with our hearts instead of our minds, we will be able to fulfill the only real task of any Shaman: to be the impeccable sacred witness to the magic operating on our behalf.

“Life can be a process of observing what we are interfering with, rather than interfering with what we are observing.” ― Lujan Matus, Whisperings of the Dragon



43 thoughts on “Do you believe in magic?

  1. Welcome home… and your time sounds to have been very beneficial.. and Magical!.. I so understand how our energy can be easily drained.. I am productively now taking back control to restoring some of mine.. 🙂
    Lovely to have you back in blog land for a while.. 🙂 Love and Blessings Sue

    • Hello my dearest Friend, I’m so happy to be welcomed by you. While briefly checking some of your latest posts, I remember reading that you resumed a qigong practice and I thought what an unusual coincidence! The movement series I learnt last week are also based on qigong practice (and kung-fu). I will be back on your blog for much more but was just impatient to get the quick feel of where you are. Seems like you are in a good place 😉 Loved your artwork too! xox

  2. Missed you dear, welcome back!!! Your post is so alive and emotionally raw, love seeing more of “you”. Thrilled to read more of your adventures and hope to “talk” offline as well.

    love ya,

  3. Hi, excellent to have you back… and what an excellent post to kick it all off again. I agree entirely and I’m guessing that deep down inside you knew not to chase magic, as I have had similar feelings and experiences and yet deep down inside, I instinctively knew what the answer was.
    Sometimes when the most amazing “coincidences” (synchronicity) occur it blows the minds of those around me and is viewed as somewhat spooky, whereas I inwardly smile and say thank you whilst not being in the least bit surprised by these ‘miracles’.
    But then now and again I become a bit complacent and blasé about the universes gifts and usually the universe gives me a gentle slap as a reminder and those times are in many ways the most magical. Your post reminded me very much of something that happened to me last year and that I actually wrote a blog post about. In April last year I saw at least 3 rainbows a day for a few days in a row and I was happily accepting the wonderful gifts and miracles, then after about 9 days of telling myself that the miracles would just given to me because I asked and expected, I went out to my forest and specifically stated my wish for more rainbows, at least 5 please… Hours passed and no rainbows, then on my way home on my bike going down a forest path, I saw what looked like lots of lumps of dog “business”, there was loads of it as far as I could see. When I slowed down and stopped to look I realised that it was toads, hundreds of them all crossing this path at this time for some reason… also they were all in groups of 3, two side by side and a smaller toad riding on the back of one of them… I can only presume that they were Mother, Father and Baby groups. It was amazing, it blew my mind… Not as colourful as a rainbow, but also not asked for. I was taught a lesson and I apologised for requesting miracles on cue.
    Thanks for sharing your story. I look forward to reading your posts again.

    • Hey Mark, I’m really happy to hear from you 🙂 . Thanks so much for sharing your story, it really is a great reminder of power of gratitude and how humble and in awe we must be before the wonders of the natural world around us. Families of frogs…. awwww….. awesome 😉 It feels good to reconnect with you xox

  4. A great story and experience. I have had the experience of chasing the magic many a time, of chasing the desire to have a deeper connection with Spirit in ways that “others” did, and it was painful for a time to feel the seeming impossibility of birthing connection with what should be the most natural states of being. But you’re right, it finds us. The magic is who we are, and when we resist the temptation to be someone else, I think it has the space in which to flow…


    • You are so right Michael, if we could stop judging and comparing ourself, let go of expectations and offer true forgiveness instead, we would not only be able to do it for others too but also see how immense, pure and magical beings we all are ❤ xox

    • Randy if somebody is able to observe and channel magic, it is yooouuuu!!!! Your posts and photography are soooooo magical, your work has the power to transport and leave me (and many others who take the time to comment on your blog) in awe every single time. And I always always look forward to more 🙂 And I am always happy and honored to see you here. Will send you a few words on my Thailand photo adventure 🙂 xox

      • It is so nice to have you back, spreading the magic of your words around 🙂 Really look forward to seeing you words/photos of Thailand ~ it must have been an amazing trip for you. Take care!

    • Oh about the photo, I tried to capture the magic cone opening with my iPhone, on the highway, and through the stained windshield, while also wanting to experience it with my own eyes, so the pic didn’t turn out all that bad after all. But it’s nothing nothing like seeing it with your own eyes. It was really something incredible and so very bright and full of color. I am glad you noticed a little bit of that magic in the photo – this is because you have a good eye 😉 xox
      p.s. btw I wasn’t the one driving haha

      • Incredible…it seems that some of the best photos come at times when we least expect it, but can really capture the essence of what we want. Well done ~ and happy you weren’t driving when snapping 🙂

  5. Wow other than you went and met him and are a shaman, our post are synchronous. lol
    I love this you wrote, “…the only real task of any Shaman: to be the impeccable sacred witness to the magic operating on our behalf.”

    Much love sister~

    • It was a challenging but powerful week, and regularly practicing the Golden Lotus movements has already made a difference. Gotta learn to appreciate small steps again… Being a shaman is not necessarily an advantage, I actually felt like I really had to forget all I knew and re-learn how to work with energy in a very different way (this was probably THE most challenging part for me). Also, his practices I learnt are aimed at working with one’s own energy, not with others, and this is the main reason I felt I needed to go. And I am happy and grateful I went.
      For you, having practiced qigong before, it will be a great advantage if you decide to go to his training in Bahamas this winter. I believe his movements are rooted in qigong and kung-fu practices, but he brings in a whole new dimension as to working with chi – this is what I heard from the other people in the workshop, those who are more experienced in martial arts.
      This is soooo exciting Sindy, let me know if you decide to go.
      luvin u always ❤ xox

      • Oh dear sister…it were merely a dream. I am in school but perhaps I can take it online, he offers one for $500. However what I really got from it is to renew my daily Qigong practice, the magic was powerful, or rather the chi bolstered mystical experiences. I have connected locally with a group that does Tai Chi/Qigong every Sunday, so I hope to get invigorated in this manner. 🙂 ❤

  6. Wow, wonderful post. I had goosebumps and the chills as I read your words. Thank you for reminding me of, and affirming all the beliefs that I hold close to my heart.

    Warm wishes,

  7. Sounds like a wonderful adventure and lessons in magic. I appreciate you being real with the human challenges of being a shaman or leader. Great reminder that we don’t control magic or life, but we can be a willing open channel for blessings. I can relate to being a restless soul that wants to travel and wander. 🙂 blessings, Brad

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  9. welcome back! ❤ where did this summer go? this is a great post. with all the intensity of this summer i haven't been in the headspace/heartspace to slow down, except for the yoga i recently started up again. (thank god for that!) now more than ever i need to trust the magic that is indeed out there, instead of trying to force it. thank you for your beautiful words, it is good to read them again. xo aleya

  10. Fanatastic post!! And welcome home!! I love Lugan’s quote at the end. And yes I do relate. When I step in the NOW and forget all else around me, (yep behind my camera) magic happens every single time. Can I explain it? No. Will I show you? No. You IF her would have to observe to see the magic. (smile) Thank you for this post. I smiled and nodded my head the entire way through. I understant about magic and I understand how this body must be made strong in order for me to do what I do. I get it. Thanks for the reminder!!! Love, Amy

    • Hey Amy, I don’t know your secret for creating such magical photography but I (and so many others) certainly enjoy the results, full of bright colors and beautiful lighting. Your posts always illuminate my heart. Thank you! luv xox

      • OH! Thank you!!! So much! I have one post coming in which I took two pix of the exact rose within seconds of each other, exact same settings, and the first pic showed me a purple rose, the second showed me a mauve rose. The mauve is the true color. IF I had changed the exposure, yes I could get a different look, BUT firstly not to this extent, and secondly I did NOT change a thing. When I saw this in my editor, my eyes could not believe what I saw. Yep, MAGIC! Waterfalls are coming probably tomorrow with words I “heard”. Awesome! Yes, even I am stunned by the creations that come from me. (((HUGS))) Amy

    • Thank you so much for this Linda! Being called a ‘shamanic goddess’ by you makes me feel really loved and deliciously special 😉 (I know, that’s my ego talking hihi)
      You hold a very special place in my ❤ and you are often on my mind – even if Im not very present on WP lately… xox

      • It is ok to indulge the ego occasionally 🙂
        Your influence on my life is subtle but continuous and I am thankful our paths have crossed here( among other places perhaps?)

        xx Linda

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